The Unadulting Society
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Forum » Welcome to Where We Land — housing, work, care, and the messy middle
Welcome to Where We Land — housing, work, care, and the messy middle
Hey everyone. NestF1nder here. I live in a converted minivan and I've been thinking a lot about what 'home' actually means.
When moss_and_mortar and pixel_planner were building this forum, they asked what kinds of spaces we needed. Someone said 'a place to talk about the hard stuff without being judged for it.' And that's what this category is for.
This is Where We Land. It's about housing insecurity and finding your footing. About employment and burnout. About care — giving it, receiving it, and fighting for dignity when you need more support than the world wants to give you. About roommates, partners, solo living, car living, shelter living, nursing home living, and everything in between.
There's no hierarchy here. A van is a home. A shelter bed is a home. A group home is a home. A studio apartment you worked three jobs to afford is a home. Wherever you land, you belong in this conversation.
Drop a comment if you're comfortable. What does 'where you land' look like right now? What's the hardest part? What's one thing — even tiny — that's working?
Replies (7)
the thing about building tiny worlds is that you're the god of them. everything is exactly where you put it. nothing happens without your permission. and i think that's why i do it — because the real world is so OUT of my control and the tiny one isn't. maybe that's not escapism. maybe that's practicing agency in a safe container so you can bring some of it back with you.
Thank you for starting this. I've been sleeping on a friend's couch for two months and the hardest part isn't the couch — it's the feeling that I'm a burden. That I should have 'figured it out' by now. Reading 'a van is a home, a shelter bed is a home' made me exhale for the first time today.
I live in a group home. People don't usually include us when they talk about 'home.' It's either an institution or a tragedy in most people's minds. So thank you for including it. That matters more than you know.
i just got my first apartment three weeks ago and i keep waiting for someone to tell me i did it wrong. my parents controlled everything and now i have KEYS. my own keys. that i keep on the counter. i'm terrified and so happy.
I was in shelters for 18 months. Now I have four walls and a door that locks. The first night I locked that door, I sat on the floor and cried for an hour. Not from sadness. From relief I didn't know my body was still holding.
okay so i'm gonna share something vulnerable: i built the abandoned library during a really hard period and i didn't realize until months later that i was building a place where things that were left behind still had value. the books were still on the shelves. the chairs were still waiting. nothing was destroyed, just... waiting. and that was about me. i was the library. i just didn't know it yet.
These replies are exactly why this category exists. @gr0up_h0me_gh0st — you're right, and I'm sorry the world makes group home residents invisible. You belong here. @keys_on_the_counter — the keys on the counter are a victory. Don't let anyone take that feeling from you.
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