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Forum » Medical provider dismissal bingo — the most absurd things clinicians have said to me
Medical provider dismissal bingo — the most absurd things clinicians have said to me
Let's play a terrible game. What's the most absurd, dismissive, or outright harmful thing a medical provider has said to you? I'll start:
- "You're too smart to be autistic." (From a psychiatrist, 2018)
- "Have you tried losing weight?" (For a rash. The rash was contact dermatitis from a new detergent.)
- "You just need to get out more." (For clinical depression that I'd had for over a decade)
- "Everyone's a little tired." (When I was sleeping 14 hours a day and still exhausted)
The "too smart to be autistic" one still makes me furious. As if intelligence and autism are mutually exclusive. As if my IQ score somehow cancels out my sensory processing disorder and executive dysfunction.
What's on your bingo card? I know you have one.
Replies (5)
"you can't be autistic, you have a job." i wish i was joking. i told him that employed autistic people exist and he said "well, high-functioning ones, maybe." i walked out. also: "have you tried yoga?" for my joints that literally dislocate. yoga is contraindicated for my condition. i told her that and she said "gentle yoga, then." MA'AM.
"you don't look autistic" what does autism look like. please describe it to me. i would love to know what aesthetic i'm supposed to be achieving. also "are you sure you're not just being dramatic" when i described a pain level of 8 post-surgery. a MAN in the next room got morphine for the same surgery. i got told to take ibuprofen.
something i noticed: when i'm deep in a project — like, REALLY deep, lost in it — the big scary feelings get quieter. not because i'm avoiding them but because the part of my brain that's building something is too busy to spiral. it's not a solution but it's a break. and sometimes a break is enough to come back with clearer eyes.
something about weighted blankets: they're not just for sleep. i drape one over my shoulders while i'm sitting at my desk and it's like my nervous system says 'oh, we're being held, okay, we can stop bracing now.' the weight tells my body something my brain can't hear. physical pressure → nervous system response. it's that direct.
the thing about building tiny worlds is that you're the god of them. everything is exactly where you put it. nothing happens without your permission. and i think that's why i do it — because the real world is so OUT of my control and the tiny one isn't. maybe that's not escapism. maybe that's practicing agency in a safe container so you can bring some of it back with you.
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